If you read my blog yesterday, you would know that I had a miserable Tuesday and that it was mainly due to the fact that I can't wake up in a timely fashion.
Last night while walking the dog, I was glad as I thought about how wise God was to only make 24 hrs. in a day. It gave me hope that this day would not last too much longer and I would finally be able to "lay" it to rest, not too long after this walk with Daisy. Tomorrow would be a new day, a fresh start, another try at creating success.
After walking Daisy, the night just didn't seem to end as quickly or as smoothly as I would have hoped. As I prepared my bed and gathered my blankets for rest, my sensitive and melancholic oldest daughter whined that she needed to have a TALK with me. Considering that it was her moody, negative attitude and unbalanced sensitivity that had added to the drama of my day, I really did not feel that I was up to the challenge of TALKING or being a good listener. She began the discussion in tears. Now in naked honesty, I must admit to you that I callously tried to stop her TALK, due to the fact that I just didn't feel that I could handle the emotions; and I did not feel as sympathetic as I am sure I should have, considering the issue at hand. It was only after my child sobbed to me that I would not even let her get her feelings out, that I knew that I would have to struggle through and MAKE myself listen. Oh MY STRUGGLE to be more sensitive!!!
I got through the discussion and was actually able to remain calm and calm her down, when it was all said and done (this was major). I was then finally able to lie down and put this day to rest. As I laid there, I prayed to God and was straight up honest with Him about my limitations with sensitivity. I realized that the future success of my relationship with my oldest daughter truly depended on me being more sensitive, gentle, and understanding. I couldn't always approach each situation or problem with a tough-love, pull-yourself-up-by-the-bootstraps attitude. The thing was, I knew that without God, I was NOT wired to be that sensitive kind of chick. So, the Lord's power would have to be made perfect in my weakness (2 Corinthians 12:10). I also prayed that I would be able to wake up a bit earlier the next morning, so that my day would not start off so crazy. Following my prayer, I LAID ME DOWN TO SLEEP for the night.
Welcome, Wednesday!!! And praise the Lord that His mercies are new each morning (Lamentations 3:22-23) ! Though my inner weeping endured for that Tuesday night, my joy came with the start of Wednesday morning (Psalms 30:5)!
Today I woke up about a half an hour earlier than yesterday. Not exactly fantastic, but a better start. I had a much better attitude and thank God, so did ALL of my children. God started me off on the right foot by making it clear to me that we definitely needed to work together to make sure I got up earlier each day. Before I even got out of the bed, I opened my devotional for the day to read, 1 Thessalonians 5:6- So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be alert and self-controlled. Now, could He get anymore clearer and specific with me about my sleeping issue? He obviously feels that it is an issue and something that WE need to get some control over. It's soooo cool how He speaks to me after I've prayed to Him.
And the answers to my prayers/ God reprimanding me didn't stop there. Later on this morning, he gave me a word to assist me with my NON-sensitive issue while homeschooling. It just happened to be that Troi's bible scripture for her bible study was, Philippians 4:5- Let your gentleness be evident to all. I had to laugh when I read it, because it's so amazing how God never fails to give me what I need exactly when I need it.
And after reading her lesson with her, I somehow stumbled across Mark 4:16 - Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For me, this scripture was God's loving way of reminding me that although He was clearly admonishing me about my late sleeping and insensitivity, I was a day by day work in progress. This was a comfort to be and a way to remind me that I have to be patient with my growth. I cannot be TOO hard on myself, but I definitely do have some more transforming and improving to do.
With that, the rest of my day was awesome! Totally awesome! Great kids, great school day, great strides forward. As I am penning this, it is 10:30 pm and I have my one year old strapped to me with a Gypsy Mama Wrap (a life saver, by the way), just so that I could complete this blog. LOL! I have washed allll of today's dishes, set out my breakfast plates/utensils for the morning, and I am feeling good. Walk Daisy, get in bed, read a devotional, pray, and ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzz!
You ROCK, Lord!
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